In Her Room
by AshesAshesWeAllFallDeepDown
Summary: Freddie's never been in Sam's room. ILost My Mind headcanon.


"Fredison."

"Sam."

Those were their only words of greeting as Freddie Benson slid past Sam into her reasonably sized bedroom. To be honest, Freddie considered not even coming here. It took a very long internal pep-talk, and some serious inner monologue to pull himself to the Puckett residence. Which actually wasn't as intimidating as he'd imagined it. And yes, he'd imagined it.

Awkward silence dwindled between the pair. Sam was beginning to get anxious, while Freddie looked for ways to stall. Almost fifteen minutes went by before the quiet became too much.

"Was there something you wanted?" It came out sharper, and colder than the blonde intended it to. More silence. And more silence. And - what do you know - more silence. Sam sat on her bed, tentatively. It was now or never. "Can we talk about the kiss?" Freddie finally blurted out.

Sam picked up her Tamale and began to pick at it, mindlessly. "What about it?" She grumbled.

Freddie sat next her. Sam scooted away. It sucked that that had been purely instinctive. She didn't want to have to shy away from her best, and possibly only, guy friend.

But of course, that wasn't all he was.

To Samantha Puckett, Fredward Benson was truly a novelty. He was the biggest dork to ever be a dork. He had this aggravating conceitedness about his intelligence, which made it more impossible each day not to rip his face off. And yet, to Sam, something more was beginning to show.

Freddie was sensitive, and somehow strong. He'd always been on the good end of the looks department. Sam would never admit that, obviously. When conversations started to take the serious rode, Freddie wouldn't even hesitate to say his Father was an ass for leaving his Mom. He was strong to grow up the way he did. Sam wouldn't even talk about it. Because she wasn't like Freddie. She was weak, and stupid, and immature, and if she only knew from the start that hurting other people would only bring her down, she'd never have pushed Freddie away the way she did.

Admittedly, hurting others was not only a way to feel better about the way others had hurt her, it was really just something fun and creative to do when she got bored.

"Why did you do it?"

Sam squeezed her eyes shut and willed for this elusion to disappear. But it didn't, and Freddie was right there.

He's always been right there.

"Look, Benson. I don't want to get emotional. I don't want to talk about why I did what I did. I don't even want you in my house right now, so if there's some grand scheme of why you decided to show your mug on my property, speak now," She crossed her arms. Freddie stood.

"Why are you doing this? I mean, you just kiss me, you're in love with me, and you can't stop with you're dumb attitude for five seconds to just talk about it!" He shouted. From a distance, Sam heard her mother drone a 'shut up' through the walls. "I'm _in love_ with you?" Sam laughed. "Don't be an idiot, Fredweird."

Now Freddie crossed his arms. "Then why did the computer-"

"The stupid computer must have some kind of glitch. I know a guy you could call for that," Sam easily avoided the topic at hand. "You're not getting away from this! Why won't you just talk to me?" And now, Freddie was at his limits. _Well, that was quick._

Sam scoffed. "When do I ever talk to you?" Silence. "That's right. Ever." She got to her feet and glided to the door. "Now, if you would please leave, the gift shop is on your left, have a fantastic day," Sam smiled, holding the door open.

"Sam, stop!" Freddie grabbed her hand. She cursed the sudden fizzing in her stomach. "What?" Freddie swore he just heard Sam's voice crack. "Tell me why you did it."

Sam's heart was vibrating in her chest. "I don't want a stupid relationship with you," She began. Freddie felt himself deflate. "I just needed to get that kiss out of my system."

Freddie let go of her hand, and they both felt the loss. "Why? What was there to get out of your system?" He pressed.

She sighed. "We can't _ever_ be in a relationship, Freddie."

It was as simple as that. They couldn't be together, and Sam knew why. She mentally scolded Freddie for being so dense.

"Why?" And he even sounded upset about it. "Why can't we, Sam?" Because maybe, in every single crevice of his heart, Freddie was beginning to fall in love with Sam Puckett.

Her face twisted into a silent statement. One big, 'are you serious, because you might just be the smartest idiot I've ever met'.

"_Why?"_ She repeated. Freddie tensed at the tone Sam took. "Yes. That's what I said," He shifted nervously.

She shook her head and smiled. It wasn't a real smile. No, not even a little. It was sad, and a little broken. Metaphorically speaking, her smile matched her being.

"You really don't get it?"

Freddie shook his head. _Stop being adorable, you stupid dumb nerd._

"Fine," Sam sat at her desk chair. She gestured Freddie to sit across from her on her bed. "Let me tell you a story. It's your story, actually," Freddie raised an eyebrow. Sam ignored his questioning look. "You're going to move on from this town. You're going to leave Seattle and move to Hollywood to become a famous director, or maybe even a tech producer of movies all across the world. You'll go to college, meet a lovely broad, tie the knot and begin on the road to the picture perfect family," Sam took a breath.

"As for me," Freddie leaned forward. His heart was already thrumming. Which, to him was quite confusing. He'd never gotten this feeling around any other girl. Not even Carly, whom he'd adored, and somewhat stalked.

"I'll move on after high school. I'll get an irritating job around Seattle until I can afford some bus tickets and a motel room. I'll pack my bags, and leave, and not you nor anyone else can change that," Sam pulled her lips between her teeth before taking a breath and speaking again. "You don't belong in this town. You're going to leave and do some awesome things that I won't even understand, Freddie."

It was odd, hearing his name from Sam. Not that Freddie didn't like it, quite the opposite. But the sudden cracking of his heart came from the fact that Sam was actually serious. She really did have that little faith in herself.

Doesn't she realize how amazing she is?

"I don't want a relationship, Freddie. Because I'm the one who loses in the end."

Freddie took his time to get to his feet. Slowly, he stepped close to Sam. Now he's wondering how he'd never seen how broken his friend was. Maybe he should've paid attention to Sam when she was hitting him. Perhaps he could've taken some initiative to be polite when Sam insulted him. And possibly, he could've connected the dots that Sam didn't come up with these insults on her own.

_Loser._

_You'll end up alone._

_I know what I want to do when I see you._

_Failure._

_No one likes you._

Each of which was most likely a gem cracked out by Sam's 'lovely' Father. Before he left Sam and her Mom to fend for themselves, of course.

Sam Puckett had that easy, yet tough feel about her. She wasn't easy to get along with sometimes. She was violent, and maybe she had a poor attitude. But that's all Sam knew how to be. And that occasionally cruel, vicious, and outstandingly beautiful girl had Freddie's heart hanging on a thread. A thread that was far too easy to cut at this point.

"Now, I'm going to tell you a story."

That crazy blonde beauty lifted her head to intently gaze at her best friend.

"It's about my best friend," He hesitated in between words. "She's smarter than she gives herself credit for. She's got just enough time to live the way she wants to. She's," Freddie took Sam's hand again. "Beautiful. And funny. Maybe she's a little insane, but I," This was where it got rough.

Freddie couldn't tell you what he was feeling. He loved Sam. He absolutely did. But it was new. This whole thing was foreign. And honestly, Freddie was _just_ realizing all of this. Freddie knew he loved her. He's loved her since day one. He's loved her the way that Carly loved him from the start. He's loved her the way she loved Carly.

And now, Freddie thought with a start, I'm falling in love with her.

"I think she's perfect."

Sam's crying now.

Freddie's _never_ seen Sam cry.

Not like this.

Because no one, in the history of Sam's life, has ever thought she was perfect.

"The story goes like this." Suddenly, Freddie remembers what he began saying. "I'll move on after high school. I'll get a college degree, and have some wicked awesome career involving something I can see myself doing for a lifetime. My best friend Sam will be there," Sam smiled, it was still sad, and broken. "She'll let me tutor her in high school. Her grades are going to fly up to A's. And after high school, she'll get into some extremely lucky college. She'll get her degree, and she'll have the life she deserves, with or without me. That's her choice."

All she did was nod. And that was okay with Freddie.

"I really want to try this, Sam." And he did.

"Okay." Because she did too.

"Will you go on a date with me?" After his long speech, Freddie was suddenly nervous, which he himself found comical.

Now, finally, Sam's smile met her eyes. She stood from her seat and wrapped her best friend, and so much more, into a hug, which he gladly returned.

"You're buying."

And Freddie would do so.

Gladly.


End file.
